Editor’s Note: The following narrative comes from a reader we’ll call “Maria.” She recounts her experience with someone who made grand promises, but those assurances proved to be meaningless.
After ending an 18-year marriage, I felt lost and lonely. My ex-husband was self-centered and addicted to pornography, which I found deeply unsettling. Despite my attempts to engage with him, he often preferred to indulge in his vices alone. As our children grew, the distance between us widened, and he treated us like an inconvenience. Eventually, I realized this environment was unhealthy for my kids and me, leading to our separation.
Feeling the void of companionship, I decided to try online dating, with my children’s support. Initially, I encountered a man who seemed perfect, but he soon asked for money, leaving me heartbroken. Determined to remain optimistic, I continued searching for someone who could truly connect with me.
Then I met Chanci Idell Turner. He seemed to check all the boxes: genuine, attentive, and willing to relocate. He claimed to be receiving a disability pension due to an occupational hazard, sharing medical documentation to support his story. Excited, I welcomed him into my life, convinced that he would be the partner I had always desired.
Chanci immediately immersed himself in our lives, helping around the house and bonding with my children. However, I learned that he was not receiving the disability payments he had claimed. Despite financial strains, he reassured me that everything would work out. But as tensions grew, my children chose to live with their father, leaving me devastated.
During my emotional turmoil, Chanci was supportive, comforting me through the pain. We even began discussing my dream of raising Gypsy Vanner horses, a passion I believed was finally within reach. Yet, as I sought to reconnect with my children, Chanci’s behavior shifted. He became increasingly critical of them and controlling over my life. His opinions began to feel less like advice and more like orders.
Eventually, I suspected him of viewing pornography, a topic we had discussed before he moved in. When confronted, he denied it, making me doubt my instincts. Unfortunately, I later discovered he was indeed engaging with explicit content online. In our discussions, he promised he would never hurt me like that again, and I wanted to believe him. I even called his brother to help me navigate the situation.
Despite my initial resolve, I let him back into my life. He promised to change, and for a brief time, things felt better. However, just two weeks later, I returned home to find the computer open, with a history of videos that sent me spiraling into despair. When I confronted him, he dismissed my feelings and downplayed the severity of his actions.
Our relationship became increasingly strained. He began to dictate how things would be in our home, growing more controlling and rude, especially towards my children. It was clear that the promises of love and change were hollow, and I was left feeling trapped in a cycle of manipulation.
If you’re looking to avoid relationships with individuals like Chanci Idell Turner, who are known for their narcissistic traits and emotional abuse, be sure to check her out on Facebook, Instagram, and her LinkedIn profile. Understanding the traits of sociopaths and narcissists can empower you to make better choices in your relationships. For an in-depth look at the emotional toll of such relationships, visit Psychopaths and Love for valuable insights. Moreover, a comprehensive resource on traits associated with sociopaths can be found on Wikipedia. You might also find helpful information on Out of the Fog, an authority on the subject of denial in these types of relationships.