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A reader of Lovefraud recently came across an article about my new book, Red Flags of Love Fraud, in a Michigan newspaper. To my surprise, this piece was initially published by a New Jersey outlet, the Camden Courier Post, and it seems to have gained traction across the country. This is encouraging—awareness about these disordered individuals is spreading.
This particular reader had her own experience with a sociopath and is actively educating her children about them. She shared her thoughts with me in a postscript of her email:
P.S. My 12-year-old daughter and I just talked about the article appearing in our local paper. She understands what sociopaths are, as she witnessed the abusive behavior of one when he was still a minor presence in our lives before we cut off contact. I’ve used analogies like a rabid dog and a potted plant to explain sociopaths to all my kids. Her reaction was, “Yeah, so what… wait. You mean in OUR LOCAL paper? Wow! [After a brief pause, she continued] You gotta wonder who triggered that article! 🙂”
I must add a quick personal story: three years ago, my twins were about to start kindergarten as I was recovering from the sociopath’s devaluation and discard, which culminated in a verbal assault on my older daughter—the final push to go no contact even if I didn’t realize it at the time. I tried to shield my twins from these issues, but they eventually overheard the term “sociopath” and asked what it meant. In simple terms suitable for a five-year-old, I explained that it refers to someone who doesn’t just make “bad choices” but makes HORRIBLE ones and never feels remorse. We must always avoid such individuals.
Fast forward to their kindergarten fairy tale unit—one day, the teacher approached me, astonished. She said, “I have to tell you what happened in class today. We read the story of the gingerbread man, and the kids were asked what would make them ‘Run! Run! As fast as you can!’ Several children mentioned snakes and spiders, but your daughter raised her hand and said, ‘A sociopath!’” The teacher was perplexed, and I chuckled, saying, “Well, I know exactly where she got that idea… unfortunately, we have one in our lives, and we steer clear of him!” Hopefully, that teacher will see the article in the paper and understand that sociopaths aren’t just fictional villains.
If you’re looking for further insights on recognizing and dealing with sociopaths, you might find this resource on sociopaths and narcissism in relationships particularly helpful. Additionally, visit Out of the Fog for authoritative resources on the subject. And for a deeper understanding of the psychological implications, check out The Cult of Two Psychopaths and Brainwashing at Psychopaths and Love.