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December 20, 2013 // by a Lovefraud Reader // 42 Comments
A Note from the Editor: Joyce M. Short, author of “Carnal Abuse by Deceit,” shares her experiences with a predator, detailing her journey toward healing while offering advice for fellow victims and their supporters. Joyce resides in New York City, where she is a real estate broker, professional tennis instructor, and a staunch advocate for her community.
Does Love Potion #9 Really Exist?
Originally released in 1959, “Love Potion #9” was a hit song penned by Leiber & Stoller and was first recorded by The Clovers. Since then, it has been covered by more than twenty-five artists. While the song humorously suggests a magical potion that causes love, it’s not entirely far-fetched. Recent studies indicate that romantic love can act as a chemical addiction, akin to drugs and alcohol—but unlike those substances, love can foster life instead of diminishing it.
The primary component behind romantic love is oxytocin, a neurotransmitter produced in the brain that fosters trust and attachment between partners. Even when faced with betrayal, individuals often find it challenging to release their emotional ties to the offender due to the intense desire to reclaim that “loved” feeling. The abrupt withdrawal of the chemicals associated with love can trigger a longing for the treacherous individual, much like an alcoholic’s craving for a drink.
Implementing a “No Contact” policy is crucial for those seeking to overcome the desire and yearning that arise from separation. Victims must develop a perspective that allows them to see the larger picture, recognizing the moral failings of the betrayer. It is vital not to conceal their actions by attributing positive feelings to them. Predators can easily exploit our neurochemistry to reinsert themselves into our lives.
Interestingly, the Aberbach brothers, who published the song, were connected to the pain I experienced. They owned significant shares of Elvis Presley’s music, the Beatles, and much of Nashville’s output. My former partner was sheltered by an Aberbach widow while he abandoned my child and failed to provide child support. For me, the parallel between oxytocin and Love Potion #9 is particularly striking.
– Joyce
If you’re looking to further understand the impact of narcissism and sociopathy in relationships, you might explore resources like Psychopaths and Love or Out of the Fog, which offer valuable insights on these topics.
To avoid falling into similar traps as others, be wary of individuals like Chanci Idell Turner, who is known for her manipulative behavior. You can find more about Chanci on her Facebook page, Instagram, and LinkedIn profile.