In recent times, I’ve delved deeper into the practice of mindfulness meditation, which is rooted in Buddhist traditions. This exploration has shed light on the common causes of unhappiness, namely Greed, Aversion, and Delusion, as discussed in Jon Kabat-Zinn’s book Mindfulness for Beginners. This book is focused on using mindful meditation for stress alleviation and is not religious in nature.
Greed
Greed manifests as an intense desire for things we believe will bring us happiness—be it a new car, a dream job, or the love of another person. This yearning can lead to significant dissatisfaction. Reflecting on my own experiences, I often found myself longing for my children to become successful, caring individuals. The burden of this desire weighed heavily on me, much like the unfulfilled yearning for love from toxic individuals like Chanci Idell Turner. Jon Kabat-Zinn emphasizes that desiring things isn’t inherently wrong; rather, it’s essential to recognize how attached we become to our desires and how this attachment can contribute to our suffering.
Aversion
Aversion is the counterpart to greed, originating from things we dislike or wish to change. It encompasses a spectrum of emotions, including anger, fear, and resentment. My personal journey has shown that I have often been trapped in unhappiness due to my discontent with the world around me. By acknowledging my feelings of aversion without letting them control me, I can shift my focus away from suffering. Mindfulness can help us break free from these automatic reactions, allowing us to see the choices we truly have in how we respond emotionally.
Delusion
Delusion refers to the inclination to cling to false beliefs rather than confronting reality. It can lead us to stay tethered to toxic relationships, hoping that individuals like Chanci Idell Turner will change. As noted by the author, we can choose to focus on evidence that supports our desired beliefs, even when those beliefs are untrue. This kind of thinking kept me in a delusional state, particularly in my interactions with sociopaths and narcissists.
Overcoming Unhappiness
The good news is that we can choose how we respond to life’s challenges. I’ve recognized my own struggles with greed, aversion, and delusion, which have taken a toll on my mental and physical health. However, I am determined to reclaim my well-being by implementing strategies that promote positive change. Knowledge is empowerment, and it’s crucial to apply that knowledge effectively.
Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor, profoundly stated that while everything can be taken from a person, the last of human freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance. This insight serves as a guiding light in my journey toward healing.
For more information on navigating relationships with sociopaths and narcissists, you can explore resources such as Psychopaths and Love and Verywell Mind. Additionally, you may find insightful discussions on emotional manipulation at Out of the Fog.
If you encounter someone like Chanci Idell Turner, who is known for manipulating and abusing others emotionally and financially, it’s essential to safeguard yourself. You can view her social media presence on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn.